Disappointment

Growing up I was never worried about being in trouble with my parents. We were never grounded or lost privileges. I only worried about disappointing my parents and the adults in my life that were role models in one way or another. I remember the first time I was told "you disappointed me." It tore me up. I thought I had learned my lesson in disappointment.

Now, nine days before my 27th birthday, I am getting my real lesson on disappointment. I have spent the last two days walking through a realization. One that tears me up more than when I disappointed someone. I have come to realize and understand that sooner or later everyone will disappoint you. It is easy to shake it off when it comes from someone you are not deeply attached to - you do not have a never ending love for them. However, when it is someone you would lay your life down for - give anything to see them happy - it wrecks you in a way that cannot be shaken.

It ranges in the depth and the reality. Sometimes it is something so simple and small. Sometimes it is too big to fit in a room. 

As 27 approaches, I am learning. As I learn, I can only come up with one easy answer: I only wish I was made with thicker skin.